"Stop resenting rivals; redirect frustration to the decision-maker Brad Guzan described how he and Tim Howard competed for the same US goalkeeper spot for years while remaining genuine friends. His framework was clear: "if the manager picked him, I can't be mad at Tim — my beef is I need to go speak to the manager and say what do I need to do to get in the team." Directing your energy toward understanding the gap between your performance and what the decision-maker needs — rather than resenting the person who got the nod — is both more productive and preserves working relationships. Source: Brad Guzan, Men in Blazers Live, US vs Belgium Pre-World Cup Show"